COME HANG OUT IN THE GROUP
Tuesday, February 7, 2023
Top-Rated Senior Lifestyle Magazine
ADVERTISEMENT
  • HOME
  • ABOUT
    • Our Mission: 50 Plus Today, Senior Lifestyle Magazine
    • Our 50PlusToday Team
    • 50PlusToday Advisory Council
    • In the News
    • Subscribe
    • Contact Us
  • WORK WITH US
    • Be Our Guest – 50PlusToday Online Senior Lifestyle Magazine
    • Advertorials (Sponsored Content) 50PlusToday
    • Online Advertising Agreement
    • Join Our Advance Book Review Team
    • The 50PlusToday SECOND ACT Award
  • HOT TOPICS
    • Health
    • Living
    • Money
    • Second Act
    • Technology
    • Travel
    • Work & Purpose
    • Gift Guides
    • Product Reviews
  • GIFT GUIDES
  • 50PLUS DIRECTORY
    • 50PLUS BUSINESS DIRECTORY
    • EVENT CENTER
      • FIND AN EVENT (FREE!)
      • ADD AN EVENTS (FREE!)
No Result
View All Result
  • HOME
  • ABOUT
    • Our Mission: 50 Plus Today, Senior Lifestyle Magazine
    • Our 50PlusToday Team
    • 50PlusToday Advisory Council
    • In the News
    • Subscribe
    • Contact Us
  • WORK WITH US
    • Be Our Guest – 50PlusToday Online Senior Lifestyle Magazine
    • Advertorials (Sponsored Content) 50PlusToday
    • Online Advertising Agreement
    • Join Our Advance Book Review Team
    • The 50PlusToday SECOND ACT Award
  • HOT TOPICS
    • Health
    • Living
    • Money
    • Second Act
    • Technology
    • Travel
    • Work & Purpose
    • Gift Guides
    • Product Reviews
  • GIFT GUIDES
  • 50PLUS DIRECTORY
    • 50PLUS BUSINESS DIRECTORY
    • EVENT CENTER
      • FIND AN EVENT (FREE!)
      • ADD AN EVENTS (FREE!)
No Result
View All Result
Top-Rated Senior Lifestyle Magazine
No Result
View All Result
Home All Trending Articles

What comes after “Thank you”?

07/13/2020
in All Trending Articles, Living, Memos from Manhattan
A A
9
no problem
0
SHARES
0
VIEWS
ADVERTISEMENT

Table of Contents

  • Well, That’s a Problem
  • That’s right, my friends, “you’re welcome” is dying away. 
  • But here’s the rub, more often than not my thanks receives a “no problem.”
  • I like saying thanks, expressing gratitude. 
  • “You’re welcome” is just a step up.
Views: 2,750

by Arlen Hollis Kane

 

Well, That’s a Problem

You’re welcome.”  I just had to get that out.  You may be wondering why I dangled that without so much as a “thank you” preceding it.  As I said, I had to get it out there – and fast, because it may be the last time you’ll ever hear it.

That’s right, my friends, “you’re welcome” is dying away. 

It appears to be fading into the same archaic ether as thou shalt not, your chariot awaits, and I need a new typewriter ribbon.

Lest (ahem…) you think I’m someone who pines for earlier times, let me assure you I’m as much a modernist as anyone who paints their walls gray.  I might even call myself a futurist as I rinse my cans and bottles before I recycle, and hope we find evidence of life on other planets before I die.  I dress on trend, even if that trend skews middle-age.  I take heart when I read that 50 is the new 35, and 35 is the new 20.  I may take heart but I don’t take it to heart.  I’m not getting pop-up ads for Huggies anytime soon.

Yet with all my gazing toward the cosmos, I long for customs that we learned as kids, like saying thank you and you’re welcome.  We were told to thank Aunt Millie for the nice eggplant casserole, and with those instructions we learned to be grateful for another’s efforts and thoughtfulness, even if we fed it to the dog later on.  If we were thanked, we welcomed it. I’m not meaning to imply that we have become a completely barbaric society – that’s a topic for another column.  People still offer a thank you and answer to it. 

But here’s the rub, more often than not my thanks receives a “no problem.”

It seems as though in this world fraught with problems, nothing is ever a problem anymore.  How can that be?  Just this morning I had a problem with my coffee maker.  Last night my window shade kept snapping up and sounded like a gunshot.  The glue used to hold my kitchen tiles in place seems to be failing.  My iPhone… oh, don’t get me started.  In short, I have problems all the day long.  It’s true that some are minor, and then there are the calls to straighten out a big accounting mistake with a hospital or utility.  Have you ever been there?  That’s a bottle of Excedrin problem.

Although I seem to have problems, big and small, the people I encounter doing their jobs seem to be immune.  The barista concocting a grande latte, laced with caramel, sprinkled with sea salt, topped by hand-ground cinnamon, garnished with mint, and donned with a cap of dense foam that could float a small boat, well, he hasn’t a problem filling that order.  The guys delivering the sofa that wouldn’t fit through my door, they hadn’t a problem either.  The saleswoman who spent most of her morning helping me find a light bulb they no longer manufacture, hadn’t a problem with it.  I overheard a technician at the Geek Squad, who fielded a hundred questions from a computer novice, say “no problem.”  But I didn’t believe him.  He took the rest of the day off.

I like saying thanks, expressing gratitude. 

I like being polite.  My mother would approve.  Although the circumstances are often problematic, like deciding whether to return a sofa or slice it in half, I don’t think I am being a burden.  So the assurance of “no problem” feels like I’m being absolved of the guilt I should be feeling.  I’d rather my profuse gratitude, augmented by an obscene tip, be welcomed.

Where I live in Manhattan, we have a nice diversity of ages – lots of young people, families and loads of seniors.  It makes for intergenerational friendships and I like it.  However it’s mainly the seniors who populate the local buses.  The bus drivers are good about easing the way for their passengers to board by lowering the front step. People appreciate that and since it only entails he press a button, it’s quite literally no problem for the driver.

On a recent evening I waited at a bus stop with quite a few seniors.  The doors opened but the step wasn’t lowered.  I watched as one by one, people hoisted themselves up the high step and onto the bus.  At the time it seemed not so nice and yet everyone managed, and maybe even felt good about the bit of exercise and the accomplishment.

Nevertheless I was bothered by it, and for my entire ride I wondered about this sweet-faced driver and why he would compel his older passengers to exert themselves that way.  Was something sinister lurking behind his engaging smile?  Did he dislike the elderly?  I wondered whether he would have lowered the step had someone really struggled.  I never found out.  But I did find out something else. 

As I left the bus through the front door, as most New Yorkers do, I threw out my usual “thank you” to the driver.   He threw back a jovial “you’re welcome!”   And that’s when I decided…

“You’re welcome” is just a step up.

 

 

Arlen Hollis Kane

Arlen Hollis Kane

Arlen Hollis Kane is a Manhattan-based award-winning writer.  Memos from Manhattan, her regular column for 50PlusToday, is reflective of her love affair with her hometown.  Her focus is on writing about the ever astonishing people, places and events that inspire the phrase “only in New York.”

After reaching 50, she fulfilled a childhood passion by enrolling in the Fashion Institute of Technology.  She designs and hand makes scarves, handbags and jewelry. Her abstract acrylics and photographs were featured in a one-woman show in the Gallery of the Borough President of Manhattan, and in juried shows, including at the National Arts Gallery.

Arlen volunteers for Dorot, an organization that helps seniors stay engaged and socialized, and Big Apple Greeter, which gives visitors the experience of seeing New York with a local.

 

 

 

 

Previous Post

A Meaningful Thanksgiving Need Not Look Like a Norman Rockwell Painting

Next Post

Chocolatey Chocolate Mousse – Only 3 Ingredients!

POPULAR

valentine gifts for senior women
Valentine's Day Gifts

18 Unique and Special Valentine Gift Ideas for Any 50Plus Women in Your Life

02/06/2023
valentines gifts for men
Valentine's Day Gifts

18 Creative Valentines Gifts for 60 Year Old Men

02/06/2023
valentine's day gift ideas for seniors
Valentine's Day Gifts

Our Top 25 Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas for 2023 For Your 50Plus Loved Ones (Great Options for Both Men and Women!)

02/03/2023
Next Post
chocolate mouse

Chocolatey Chocolate Mousse - Only 3 Ingredients!

Comments 9

  1. Dora Issacharoff says:
    3 years ago

    A few days ago I entered a store on Madison Avenue to by a couple of ties as presents. I have been going to this store for ages and the owner, at the end of the purchase, walked me to the door and opened it for me, said “have a nice day and come again”. I thanked him and was surprised of how easy is to make another person feel better and
    welcome.
    Why don’t we do it more often?

    Reply
    • LFpublisher says:
      3 years ago

      I wish more people did!

      Reply
  2. Debbi says:
    3 years ago

    Thank you for that – I have this conversation with my mom a lot! Basic manners seem to be fading – but on the positive side – when someone DOES say thank you or please or hold the door open etc. I feel such elation that it lasts through many ‘no problems’! fun article, I’m now off to get my double whip carmel macchiato 🙂

    Reply
    • LFpublisher says:
      3 years ago

      ???

      Reply
  3. Jim Buckley says:
    3 years ago

    I’ve been in Paris for over a month this time around and you’ll be pleased to hear that every Frenchman and woman in the capital upholds the tradition of saying “Bonjour,” “Bonsoir,” “Merci,” “Merci beaucoup,” “Bonne journée,” and “Je vous en prie,” after every encounter, even the smallest. Niceties reign supreme here. Vive la France! And, oh, by the way, I enjoyed your column.

    Reply
    • LFpublisher says:
      3 years ago

      Glad to hear it – thank you for sharing!

      Reply
  4. Jerry says:
    3 years ago

    Great article, Arlen! I join you in wincing whenever someone says, “No problem!” after I say, “Thank you!” My response used to be, “Oh, was there a problem? I didn’t know there was a problem. Glad I wasn’t a problem!” (Sigh) But, I gave up finally. Now, I simply say, “Ok” when someone hands me my change or my fast food order. Saying, “Ok” short-circuits the “No problem” reply. But, by doing so, I know I’ve added to the demise of polite civilization. Oh well, no problem!

    Reply
    • LFpublisher says:
      3 years ago

      Thank you!

      Reply
    • Arlen says:
      3 years ago

      Believe me, your effort is appreciated. Don’t give up – yet!

      Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Recipe Rating




This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purposes.

Recent Posts

  • 18 Unique and Special Valentine Gift Ideas for Any 50Plus Women in Your Life
  • 18 Creative Valentines Gifts for 60 Year Old Men
  • Our Top 25 Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas for 2023 For Your 50Plus Loved Ones (Great Options for Both Men and Women!)
  • Code Name Sapphire: A World War 2 Novel by Pam Jenoff
  • Fashion For 50 Plus Women – Ideas for Outfits and Wardrobe Tips

distinctive life
gymglish




Try AARP's #1 Health App Now!

MIGHTY HEALTH is the first fitness and wellness app designed specifically for people over 50.

 

INCLUDES:
*Your own health coach
*Daily workout videos
*Personalized nutrition/exercise plans *Supportive community

START TODAY!

ACCESSIBLE AIRBNB HILL COUNTRY TX

Accessible Airbnb

DISCLAIMER: The health and wellness information included on this website is not a substitute for or a replacement of professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

Latest Reviews

  • Product Review: The Meatstick 4X
    4.15
  • BOOK GIVEAWAY! The Lipstick Bureau by Michelle Gable
    4.45
  • Once Upon a December by Amy E. Reichert
    4.55

SUBSCRIBE TODAY!


  • Privacy Policy
  • Disclosure
  • Sitemap
  • Contact

© 2022 50PlusToday. LLC All Rights Reserved

No Result
View All Result
  • HOME
  • ABOUT
    • Our Mission: 50 Plus Today, Senior Lifestyle Magazine
    • Our 50PlusToday Team
    • 50PlusToday Advisory Council
    • In the News
    • Subscribe
    • Contact Us
  • WORK WITH US
    • Be Our Guest – 50PlusToday Online Senior Lifestyle Magazine
    • Advertorials (Sponsored Content) 50PlusToday
    • Online Advertising Agreement
    • Join Our Advance Book Review Team
    • The 50PlusToday SECOND ACT Award
  • HOT TOPICS
    • Health
    • Living
    • Money
    • Second Act
    • Technology
    • Travel
    • Work & Purpose
    • Gift Guides
    • Product Reviews
  • GIFT GUIDES
  • 50PLUS DIRECTORY
    • 50PLUS BUSINESS DIRECTORY
    • EVENT CENTER
      • FIND AN EVENT (FREE!)
      • ADD AN EVENTS (FREE!)

© 2022 50PlusToday. LLC All Rights Reserved